Relationships come with a lot of perks – shared snacks, inside jokes, someone to get rid of spiders. But they also come with expectations, like not being thrown under the metaphorical bus by your partner.
It’s wild how some people will swear they’re all in, while secretly giving front-row tickets to everyone else to laugh at their partner’s expense. Because if love is a team sport, benching your significant other isn’t just rude, it’s relationship sabotage.
For one Redditor, that painful truth came crashing down when he found out he was the only boyfriend excluded from his girlfriend’s “girls’ nights out.”
More info: Reddit
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One man finds out he is the only boyfriend excluded from his girlfriend’s “girls’ night out” after dating for 3 years
The woman goes out with her friends every couple of weeks, and tells her boyfriend it’s “girls only”
The man finds out his girlfriend of 3 years is actually meeting all her friends, and he is the only one not invited, as her friends hate him
The man posted an update saying he confronted his girlfriend, and she admitted she trashed him in front of her friends at the beginning of their relationship
The man breaks up with his girlfriend after she admits to lying to him for 3 years and not standing up for him when her friends trashed him
The OP (original poster) had been dating his girlfriend for almost 3 years and things seemed solid. Every couple of weeks, she was going out with “just the girls” – nothing weird about that. The OP trusted her, as she just needed her space. All good, right? Wrong.
As it turns out, those so-called “girls nights” were actually double dates – and triple dates. Basically, a whole couple’s night extravaganza, just without him. And our guy only found out because one of the boyfriends casually referenced a night out that he had no idea had even happened. The red flags were waiving.
The OP confronted his girlfriend, but she dropped a nonchalant, “Oh, well, they just tag along sometimes.” Uh-huh, sure – tag along for 3 years? Must be a pretty loyal tag. And just when you thought it couldn’t get any worse, it did. Apparently, those nights weren’t even girls-only. In fact, they weren’t even about relaxing or unwinding or soul-healing lavender cocktails.
They were regular hangouts, with friends who openly hated him. Like, full-on “he’s the joke of the group chat” levels of hate. Why? Because apparently, early in their relationship, the OP’s girlfriend vented about him to her friends, a lot, but she forgot to circle back and tell them that they had worked things out.
So, her friends built this Frankenstein image of a partner that doesn’t even exist anymore. And instead of clearing his name, she just… let it simmer. Our guy wasn’t imagining the side-eyes or the cold vibes. Turns out, his girlfriend’s crew weren’t shy about using him as comedic inspiration, and she wasn’t exactly rushing to defend his honor.
When he asked her why she didn’t shut it down, she said she didn’t want to be the center of attention. Lady, that’s not being shy, that’s being spineless. So, our OP made the hard call and broke up with her. Not just because her friends hated him, and not just because he was lied to, but because the one person who should’ve had his back stood silently while he was the punching bag.
Because support in a relationship isn’t just about showing up during the big moments – it’s in the small stuff, too. Having your back means defending you, listening when you vent, and standing up for you when things get uncomfortable. Having an unsupportive partner, whether in front of friends or in private, can create a feeling of isolation within the relationship.
A supportive partner validates your emotions, advocates for you in tricky situations, and makes you feel emotionally safe. When a partner stays silent or neutral during tough moments, it can feel like abandonment. Without emotional support, resentment builds fast, and eventually, you stop turning to them at all.
Every relationship hits bumps, that’s true, but some roads just aren’t worth the drive, and it’s important to know when it’s time to end a relationship. If your partner lies, lets others disrespect you, and shrugs it off like it’s no big deal, that’s your sign. When someone routinely dismisses your needs or makes you feel small, it’s emotional invalidation, and it adds up.
If you find yourself constantly questioning your worth, feel like you can’t trust your partner, or feel lonelier with them than without, those aren’t quirks, they’re deal-breakers. Ending it might feel scary, but staying in a relationship where you’re not seen or valued chips away at your self-esteem one ignored moment at a time.
At the end of the day, leaving a bad relationship isn’t quitting – it’s choosing yourself. And honestly, you deserve someone who brags about you, not someone who hides you like a dirty secret.
What do you think of this story? Drop your thoughts and comments below!
Netizens side with the man, saying his girlfriend is a jerk for lying and not standing up for him
