Friendships are supposed to be all about trust, inside jokes, and having someone who won’t judge your suspicious 3 am choices. But you haven’t truly tested a friendship until you’ve shared a kitchen and a utility bill. Forget matching tattoos – try arguing over who left the milk out and whose boyfriend keeps clogging the toilet.
True friendship can survive a lot, but maybe not secret floor plans and a contractor on speed dial. And one Redditor learned this the hard way when she kicked out her bestie-turned-roommate from her home after discovering she was secretly planning to remodel it behind her back.
More info: Reddit
RELATED:Some friendships end over betrayal, others over blueprints and bathroom tiles
One woman offered her best friend a cheap room in her home, but kicked her out when she discovered she was secretly planning to remodel it
The woman had inherited the home from her dad and invited her friend to live with her for very cheap rent
The woman found messages between her friend and contractors, discovered offers and home remodeling plans
The woman kicked out her friend after finding out she was planning to remodel her house without permission while she was away
The OP (original poster) generously offered her friend a room in her inherited home for just $800 a month, way below the $2,500 market rate in their high-rent neighborhood. The friend had just started a new job and needed time to set her finances in order. So, she asked the OP if she could pay $500 instead. The OP, being a generous, non-profit-seeking saint, agreed.
But soon, something started to feel off. The roommate began sending the OP on random errands – grocery runs, coffee trips, “can you pick up my boyfriend” excuses, all while she mysteriously stayed home. At first, the OP chalked it up to introversion. But then came the video calls, the kind where you catch phrases like “load-bearing walls” and “open-concept kitchen.”
The OP, curious and probably sensing something shady, snooped a bit and struck gold. Texts, quotes, contractors, floor plans, you name it. All of them referencing her house, her address, and zero of her permission. The OP’s roommate had even tried to bribe her into a conveniently timed week-long vacation in Vegas, clearly hoping to sneak in the home makeover of the century.
Yeah, this woman didn’t want to decorate her bedroom, she wanted to bulldoze the living room. And when OP confronted her, the roommate played the classic “I wasn’t actually going to do it” card. But the evidence spoke louder than her denials. Between the blueprints, the contractors, and the sneakiness, the OP decided it was time to toss this wannabe designer out onto the curb.
So, is the OP a jerk for kicking her roomie out? I’m going with no on this one because being betrayed by a friend hits hard. It’s not just the act itself, it’s the fact that someone who knew your secrets and favorite pizza topping chose to go behind your back. Betrayal cuts deep, leaving you guarded, cynical, and carrying trust issues into future friendships.
But what happens if the friend wants to make amends? First step: they have to own it—no vague excuses, no half-hearted “I didn’t mean to,” just a real, direct apology. Then comes time and consistency. Rebuilding trust means they have to prove they’ve changed, not just say it. And it’s okay to forgive without forgetting or to walk away entirely if your gut says, “No thanks.”
Because some friendships are just not meant to last forever, especially if the trust is gone. There’s no glittery sign that tells you it’s time to end a friendship, but the signs are definitely there. If you constantly feel drained, used, judged or your boundaries are not respected, it might be time to pull the plug. Friendships should add value, not leave you feeling like you’re stuck in customer service 24/7.
A good rule of thumb? If you wouldn’t tolerate that behavior from a partner or boss, why accept it from a friend? It’s okay to outgrow people. Sometimes, the kindest thing you can do is to wish them well… from very far away. So, if someone lets you stay in their home for pennies on the dollar, maybe don’t hire a construction crew behind their back and try to send them to Vegas like it’s Ocean’s Eleven. Just saying.
What do you think of this story? Was the poster wrong for kicking out her friend after finding out about her plans? Share your thoughts and comments below!
Netizens are confused about the friend’s motives, asking why she would spend her money to renovate someone else’s home
