Money can bring a lot of great things – food, shelter, and fun activities being just a few examples. But it can also bring chaos, fighting, and resentment, among other things, especially when it has to be shared.
The latter is often the case when it comes to inheritances; unfortunately, when a loved one passes, many families are torn over the wealth they leave behind. This redditor’s family was no exception. Though for them, money wasn’t the only problem, as the situation was more complex than just sharing assets. Scroll down to find the full story in the OP’s words below.
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It’s not uncommon for an inheritance to break a family apart
Image credits: Ahmet Kurt / unsplash (not the actual photo)
For this woman’s family, troubles over inheritance involved infidelity claims and DNA testing
Image credits: Pietro Schellino / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Karolina Grabowska / unsplash (not the actual photo)
The woman provided more information in the edits she made
Image credits: Mesut çiçen / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Brock Wegner / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Ben Iwara / unsplash (not the actual photo)
Image credits: Exciting_Till8439
What people consider cheating can differ quite significantly with each person
Unfortunately, infidelity isn’t as rare of an occurrence as some people might think it is. For reasons only known to them, quite a few coupled up individuals decide to look for love or affection elsewhere, often risking their relationship. Though, it’s not all black and white, as people seem to have different definitions of what counts as cheating.
Surveys on infidelity found that for a surprising number of people, sleeping with someone other than their partner isn’t considered cheating. Close to 19% of European male respondents, and almost 15% of their female counterparts reportedly believe so. In the US, among men at least, only 3% share the same view.
For a large share—close to 44%—of American women, even going out as friends is a form of cheating. (Among European women, roughly 24% feel the same way.) Other forms of infidelity, reportedly tolerated less by Americans than Europeans, include emotional affairs and holding hands.
Despite often becoming a cause for family feuds, many people don’t want to discuss the topic of inheritance
The OP revealed that infidelity had occurred in her family, too. After her grandfather’s passing, she learned that that was the reason her grandparents’ relationship—consequently, the man’s relationship with his kids as well—had fallen apart. That also became the reason why the inheritance left by the grandfather depended on DNA testing. Needless to say, that didn’t make solving the inheritance issue any easier.
As a matter of fact, many families find it difficult to navigate relationships when inheritance and similar wealth-related issues come into the picture. Surveys suggest that as many as one-in-five families do—18% of respondents admit to have argued with family members about what they inherit. A quarter believes that failing to address the matter would cause problems if not now, then in the future.
Despite it often becoming an issue, many people don’t want to discuss the topic before they absolutely have to. Nearly a third of respondents say they do not wish to talk about inheritances because they are “too far in the future,” a quarter don’t because they don’t want to think about it, and a fifth say that it’s their business to deal with on their own.
In her post, the OP shared that, at first, she wasn’t trying to deal with things on her own. She wanted to be part of the discussion, but was shut down—twice. That led to her taking matters into her own hands and taking a DNA test, as her grandfather’s will had instructed. That started a domino effect of “everyone starting to fight with everyone,” which made her wonder if her actions made her a jerk. Fellow netizens in the comments were seemingly split over that.
Many netizens sided with the granddaughter, saying that her actions didn’t make her a jerk
Others, however, shared a different opinion
