Many years ago, the great Swiss philosopher Jean-Jacques Rousseau introduced the concept of the so-called “social contract.” According to this concept, everything created by people in the immaterial realm is simply the product of an agreement between people. We simply agree to consider something appropriate and reasonable, and something, on the contrary, 100% outrageous.
For example, we are sure that helping others in trouble (okay, not in trouble, but just facing some problems) is a must. But what if deep down we just don’t want to provide this help? Well, I guess the user NavyOrca, the author of today’s story, didn’t even suspect she was facing a philosophical problem of such magnitude when her neighbor approached her with a request to use her shower…
More info: Mumsnet
RELATED: The author of the post has a neighbor who recently asked to use her shower since her own was broken
Image credits: Pixabay / Pexels (not the actual photo)
This neighbor wasn’t the author’s close friend, but rather a nice acquaintance, and nothing more
Image credits: NavyOrca
Image credits: freepik / Freepik (not the actual photo)
The main problem was that the author had planned to stay home most of the upcoming week after working hard, and didn’t want anyone else there
Image credits: NavyOrca
So the woman was of two minds on how to act and decided to seek advice online
Actually, it’s all very simple. The Original Poster (OP) has a neighbor who recently approached her with a request to let her occasionally drop by to use her shower. The thing is, her own shower is, alas, broken, and the repair guys won’t come and fix anything until next week.
Our heroine understood perfectly well what it meant for someone to not be able to take a shower. She knew that her neighbor was a nice and pleasant person to talk to, and they had occasionally talked while walking their dogs. She also knew that the neighbor had moved to the area for work and that there were no relatives or friends around to help her. She knew all this—but in her heart, she still didn’t want to do this favor.
The author had a simply insane week at work with a heavy workload, and she would spend most of the following week off of work—so she dreamed of just sitting at home alone, relaxing, and doing nothing. That is, what is often one of the greatest joys for any person. And the neighbor, coming in from time to time to take a shower, didn’t fit into this picture at all…
But the idea of the social contract is like gravity. We may not have the slightest clue how it all works, but it still works and affects us. And now the original poster is experiencing the most severe pangs of conscience at the mere thought of refusing to help someone—albeit a little-known, but obviously good, person—in a difficult moment. And the woman decided to take it online in search of support.
Image credits: Yaroslav Shuraev / Pexels (not the actual photo)
“Well, it’s a really difficult choice – on the other hand, we should not forget that for many modern people it is difficult even to turn to others with such a completely harmless, after all, request. And even to familiar people,” says Irina Matveeva, a psychologist and certified NLP specialist, with whom We got in touch for a comment on the situation.
“I can perfectly understand the whole range of emotions that is now engulfing this woman, who just wants to relax after a stressful work week, but on the other hand, we all live in society. And such a refusal, even if it is clothed in a very polite form, will almost inevitably lead to poor relations between them.”
“So here you just need to think through the two options and decide for yourself – what is more important, to maintain a good relationship with this neighbor, or to accept some inevitable inconveniences. On the other hand, it was not for nothing that the sages of the past advised not to spit in a well from which you could drink later,” Irina concludes.
Well, it’s interesting that the opinions of people in the comments were also divided, forming approximately two equal camps. Folks of the first believe that the author should still sacrifice her emotions and help the neighbor. After all, she’s not asking for much… “I think maintaining a harmonious neighbor relationship is a good thing, you could need a favor next,” one of the first camp adherents wrote.
Others do believe that since the neighbor is not such a close acquaintance to the original poster, refusing her this favor should not be a big problem either. “She’s not a friend just a neighbor,” another responder claimed. “She’ll have to have an old school wash at the sink.” And which way would you, our dear readers, act in this situation?
People in the comments were also very divided, but most of them suggested the author do the favor, just in case
Image credits: Ron Lach / Pexels (not the actual photo)
